"All this he saw, for one moment breathless and intense, vivid on the morning sky; and still, as he looked, he lived; and still, as he lived, he wondered."

Pride Month 2025: Words of the Day

In a Kiss, a World

“Sweet boy, with honeyed eyes,
if I could kiss you as many times as I wish,
I’d kiss you three hundred thousand times —
and not once would I be satisfied.”

— Gaius Valerius Catullus, Poem 48 (1st century BCE)

Catullus, the Roman poet whose work straddled personal confession and biting wit, is best known for his turbulent relationship with “Lesbia” — but his poems also include unambiguous expressions of homoerotic desire, written with both candour and lyricism. In Poem 48, he speaks to a beautiful male youth nicknamed Juventius not as a mentor, conqueror, or satirist, but as a lover overwhelmed by longing. Same-gender desire is not coded in metaphor nor couched in apology. The speaker is direct: he wants to kiss his lover again and again, with no shame, only hunger. The intensity of his repetition — “three hundred thousand times” — transforms a kiss into a ritual of desire, obsession, and joy. He brings us into the immediacy of touch, gaze, and longing.

Catullus’s poem reminds us that queer desire in antiquity wasn’t always tragic or allegorical. It could be flirtatious, physical, even playful — a moment suspended between lips, not burdened by shame. In this fragment, we are given not only a kiss, but a glimpse into the long continuum of a queer tenderness preserved in verse.

comics and illustration

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note to self

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