"All this he saw, for one moment breathless and intense, vivid on the morning sky; and still, as he looked, he lived; and still, as he lived, he wondered."

Passato un buon Natale?

Down in the workshop all the elves were makin’ toys
For the good Gentile girls and the good Gentile boys
When the boss busted in, nearly scared ’em half to death
Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath
From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo
Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo
And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye,
"Merry Christmas to all – now you’re all gonna die!"

The night Santa went crazy
The night St. Nick went insane
Realized he’d been gettin’ a raw deal
Something finally must have snapped in his brain

Well, the workshop is gone now, he decided to bomb it
Everywhere you’ll find pieces of Cupid and Comet
And he tied up his helpers and he held the elves hostage
And he ground up poor Rudolph into reindeer sausage
He got Dancer and Prancer with an old German Luger
And he slashed up Dasher just like Freddy Krueger
And he picked up a flamethrower and he barbequed Blitzen
And he took a big bite and said, "It tastes just like chicken!"

The night Santa went crazy
The night Kris Kringle went nuts
Now you can’t hardly walk around the North Pole
Without steppin’ in reindeer guts

There’s the National Guard and the F.B.I.
There’s a van from the Eyewitness News
And helicopters circlin’ ’round in the sky
And the bullets are flyin’, the body count’s risin’
And everyone’s dyin’ to know, oh Santa, why?
My my my my my my
You used to be such a jolly guy

Yes, Virginia, now Santa’s doin’ time
In a federal prison for his infamous crime
Hey, little friend, now don’t you cry no more tears
He’ll be out with good behavior in 700 more years
But now Vixen’s in therapy and Donner’s still nervous
And the elves all got jobs working for the postal service
And they say Mrs. Clause, she’s on the phone every night
With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights

They’re talkin’ bout – the night Santa went crazy
The night St. Nicholas flipped
Broke his back for some milk and cookies
Sounds to me like he was tired of gettin’ gypped

Wo, the night Santa went crazy
The night St. Nick went insane
Realized he’s gettin’ a raw deal
Something finally must have snapped in his brain
Wo, something finally must have snapped in his brain
Tell ya, something finally must have snapped… in his brain

Advent Calendar

Mary E. Wilkins Freeman — A Discovered Pearl

“Wonder what’s goin’ on in the church?” Gilman Marlow stopped and stared slowly over at the church. It was a little white building with five pointed windows on each side. The windows were all streaming with light now, and the bright light showed from the

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Sabine Baring-Gould — Glámr

The following story is found in the Gretla, an Icelandic Saga, composed in the thirteenth century, or that comes to us in the form then given to it; but it is a redaction of a Saga of much earlier date. Most of it is thoroughly

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5 Comments
  • Njord
    Posted at 09:53h, 27 December Reply

    Buon natale? mmm …mica tanto…

  • impbianco
    Posted at 10:04h, 27 December Reply

    Natale nella norma…te Shelidon? :P

    X-Bye

  • heraclitus
    Posted at 08:53h, 28 December Reply

    più che altro… passato.

  • Damiani
    Posted at 19:55h, 28 December Reply

    passato bene

    mi posso ritenere sufficentemente soddisfatto!

    tu?

  • Shelidon
    Posted at 12:03h, 29 December Reply

    uh Damiani, meno male che ci sei tu, cominciavo a pensare che foste tutti depressi!

    Natale discreto, sì, grazie.

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Mary E. Wilkins Freeman — A Discovered Pearl

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